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Mears is going to be joining us on two conditions. First, he needs to be mentioned here. Who knew that this site was going to be so popular. Well Mears, here's your mention. The second condition was that he get a nickname.

So in concurring with Tournament Director Musky Boy, we came up with several alternatives. And please, this is riveting entertainment if there ever was any, so pay close attention.

Nominees:

Stay-Puft - My thought was "Ralph is a food salesman, so is Mears. Sara Lee sells Stay Puft, and Mears plays soft." This was disregarded becuase it could be mis-interpreted.

Sara - As in who he works for.

Junior, Shick - He looks like he hasn't shaved yet.

Minnie (Mouse) - He's Squeaky's protege (or is that vice versa?)

MasterDealer - For his dealing prowess. Dicarded becuase we'd have to rename Musky Boy to MasterBaiter, and that's just not right.

Dave and John's Golf Skins game beyotch - Not really related to poker is it?

Muck or Muckster - For Mucking a winning hand. Problem is, Regulator did that too, so it's not appropriate.

PermaBeer, BeerMilker - PermaBeer sounds like he's always drinking beer, and we know that's not true.

AND THE WINNER IS:

MonoBeer: For his 'drinking' habits.

By the way, Mears' addition does nothing to the odds, as he is strictly in the donator category until he places in the money at least once.

Also, as an aside, Dan is very close to being officially dubbed neveraise or Good Ole Calling Station.